Oh the weather outside is frightful,
And the kids are far from delightful,
Frozen on repeat, toddler with runny nose,
I’m really fed up with sodding ‘Let it go’.
The bickering shows no sign of stopping,
I’ve got to finish the Christmas shopping,
Fairy lights have started to blow,
And now it’s bloody threatening to snow.
Husband calls ‘I’ll be late tonight’
But his parents will be hear at dawn,
And unless he really wants a fight,
They better be on good form.
The toddler has started crying,
‘It wasn’t me!’ But clearly she’s lying,
‘Santa won’t come you know’
If she cares she doesn’t let it show.
The neighbours have decided to drop in,
And my head has started throbbin’
Crap I didn’t put the oven on,
The turkey’s gonna’ take too long.
At last the kids are snoozing,
So I’ve started on the boozing,
Beginning to feel Christmas cheer,
Go on then, just one more beer.
In laws are knocking at the door,
Whilst im passed out on the floor,
Decided on the earlier train,
Oh Fuck it’s Christmas again!!